We met on Tinder and hit it off immediately. We went on our first date 3 days after we matched. We couldn’t get enough of each other and soon became exclusive. We spent all of our time together. I started to stay over at his place more often than at my own, so we were basically living together. Our first year was magical and I’d never felt love like that before. I was on cloud 9.
We took a trip out of state for the new year. On our drive home, he got very serious and started listing off things that were wrong and telling me how unhappy he was. I had NO idea he’d been feeling this way. As far as I knew, we were good. We were happy. We were strong. His friends had even pulled me aside during the trip, telling me how much they loved that I was in his life, how I’d changed him for the better, how happy and in love we were.
2 days after the car ride and the talk, and after over a year of being a couple, he texted me to tell me he couldn’t do ‘this’ anymore. I tried calling him, I was sent to voice mail. I tried texting. I got short answers of any answer at all. One morning he dropped off all of my stuff off at my place, early in the morning without a heads up that he was doing so.
I didn’t even get a chance to state my thoughts or feelings.
It’s been over a year and I’m still crying over this. I honestly thought he was ‘the one’. I never got any closure and I’m left with all of these questions and what if’s. What did I do wrong? What could I have done to make things better or different?
Part of me still loves him. I’m afraid I’ll necer find love like that again. He made me feel alive and beautiful and worthy. Now, I just feel like I’m nothing.