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The first kiss was the hardest to let go. His long dark hair, his chocolate brown eyes. I was in love the second i saw him…We started as good friends as all should. He would text me to cover and i would and we always had such a great time together. One night we were just sitting next to each other listening to music when he out of the blue started playing with my fingers and my hand. I was so happy in that moment. The first guy to ever touch me in any way shape or form. It lead to my first kiss a few days later that eventually turned into more kisses, and movies and holding hands. I would go to his band practice with him and his friends and they all seemed to accept the girly girl who was dating the rocker guy….or so i thought anyways. Two months into dating and the girlfriend of one of his band members messaged me on facebook to inform me that he was telling the others i was crazy and he didnt know why i followed him to band practice all the time or why i was always around. He told them we were not dating…yet kissed me goodbye in the car every night or held my hand when he was near. He didn’t want to acknowledge the fat girl as his girlfriend…or maybe it was because i liked the color pink and didnt like the music his band made…It shattered me.. How can you sit there kissing the same girl everynight and telling her shes beautiful and touching her in places shes never been touched..only to tell everyone shes crazy and you dont like her at all….not like that anyways… my heart broke so hard..for the first kiss..the first love..the first everything.. and after that i didnt want to try anymore.. so here i am at 29 single.. and will probally stay that way after two more failed attempts at dating. only to have the first guy want sex and sex only and the other one was cheating on his girlfriend with me and i had no idea the whole time. It was as if the first kiss cursed me..so i couldnt enjoy another first kiss from that moment on..and still i have not had another kiss that has sated me the way his did that first time…

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